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My relationships

My relationships

Bullying

Bullying

Bullying is when someone hurts you or threatens to hurt you.
Bullying can be physical, such as kicking or hitting or verbal such as teasing or name-calling.

Cyber bullying
Harassing, threatening or humiliating people using text messaging, instant messaging, online chat rooms, emails and other social media sites

Cyberbullies can hide their identity and use technology to reach their victims they chose.

Signs

Bullying behaviours include:

  • Insulting, name calling teasing and taunting
  • Spreading lies or rumours about someone
  • Harassing or humiliating someone
  • Hitting, kicking or pushing someone
  • Threatening to hit, kick or push someone
  • Stealing, hiding or ruining someone’s belongings
  • Making someone do things they don’t want to do
  • Refusing to talk to someone or excluding them from groups or activities
  • Texting or using social media to send nasty or threatening messages

People who have been bullied

  • Can feel hurt, angry, afraid, helpless, isolated and ashamed, maybe even suicidal.
  • Can develop other problems such as depression, anxiety and eating problems and may self-harm or use drugs or alcohol to cope with feelings

Cyber-Bullying

  • Sending or receiving nasty or threatening emails
  • Sending or receiving nasty or threatening text messages
  • Sending or receiving nasty or threatening Facebook messages
  • Filming people and spreading it around without permission
Advice

Bullying in any form is unacceptable.

If you think you are being bullied, you must talk to someone and get help.

Talk to a parent, carer or teacher or ask a friend to do it for you.

There are many things that can be done to stop bullying. If it keeps happening then keep telling people until it stops.

Where can I get help?

In school you can talk to the following people:

  • A friend
  • Your Tutor
  • A YHS Wellbeing Advisor
  • Pupil Welfare Officer
  • Pastoral Mentor (Drop in sessions Tuesday & Wednesday during break and lunchtime)

In the community:

  • Talk to your parents or GP

Phone lines:
Childline (Free) 0800 1111
York Mind 01904 643364
Samaritans 116 123

Links:
Childline
Report Bullying 
Bullying

Friendship

Friendship

Friends are people we have fun with and who will support us through tough times

A healthy friendship has trust and respect.

Signs

Signs of a good friendship include:

  • Being supportive of each other
  • Being encouraging of each other
  • Being considerate of each other
  • Including each other in activities and conversations
  • Listening when the other wants to talk
  • Wanting to help each other
  • Not teasing, putting down or bullying each other
  • Not putting each other in danger
  • Not treating the other less kindly because of their religion or culture
  • Allowing each other to be themselves and to express themselves
  • Respecting each other disagreeing or saying no

Advice

Changes in relationships are natural but not always easy. If friendships are not going well, we can feel very upset, lonely, rejected and angry. This can then affect how we feel about ourselves, our family life, schoolwork, eating and sleeping. Friendship issues can sometimes lead to more serious problems like depression and self-harm.

Healthy friendships allow you to be yourself. If you are scared of losing a friendship by being yourself, by standing up for yourself or something you believe is right, then you are not in a healthy relationship.

Where can I get help?

In school you can talk to the following people:

  • A friend
  • Your Tutor
  • A YHS Wellbeing Advisor
  • Pupil Welfare Officer
  • Pastoral Mentor (Drop in sessions Tuesday & Wednesday during break and lunchtime)

In the community:

  • Talk to your parents or GP

Phone lines:
Childline (Free) 0800 1111
York Mind 01904 643364
Samaritans 116 123

Links:
Childline

Peer pressure and sexting

Peer Pressure & Sexting

Your ‘peers’ are people who are a similar age to you.

Peer pressure is feeling like you have to do something just because your friends or other people around you are doing it – to feel like you fit in.

Sexting – the words ‘sex’ and ‘texting’ together.
Sexting describes swapping sexual messages, photos (also known as nudies or nude selfies) or videos, usually using a mobile phone.

The Law: Sending a naked image of yourself via text message or social media, when you are below the age of 18 is illegal. It counts as an offence if caught distributing an indecent image of a child and could result with you ending up on the sex offenders register.

Signs

  • Sending or receiving rude or sexual text messages
  • Sending or receiving naked or sexual images

Advice

Many young people find it easier or less embarrassing to talk or share images via text, email and instant messaging than talking face to face about sex.

It is important that you understand that once you have sent or uploaded a photo or video you have lost all control over it for good. Even if you use Snapchat or webcams.

Any images you share over the internet could be sent to or seen by anyone, anywhere in the world including your parents, teachers or total strangers. Imagine having intimate parts of your body being seen all around the world or by a future employer or college teacher one day.

  • Only ever send text or images if you would be happy with other people seeing it.
  • Don’t send anything you wouldn’t want your parents, teachers or friends seeing.
  • Be brave and communicate face to face.

Where can I get help?

In school you can talk to the following people:

  • A friend
  • Your Tutor
  • A YHS Wellbeing Advisor
  • Pupil Welfare Officer
  • Pastoral Mentor (Drop in sessions Tuesday & Wednesday during break and lunchtime)

In the community:

  • Talk to your parents or GP

Phone lines:
Childline (Free) 0800 1111
York Mind 01904 643364
Samaritans 116 123

Links:
Childline

Sex and consent

Sex and consent

Consent means agreeing to do something at a given moment

This means you can agree one minute and change your mind the next. This is perfectly fine. If you are thinking of having any kind of sexual activity then it is really important that you are ready, that you can enjoy it and that you can take responsibility for it

The Age of Consent

  • This is the age at which you can legally have sex
  • The Law states in England, Scotland, Northern Ireland and Wales we have to be 16 or older to have homosexual (gay) or heterosexual (straight) sex
  • Sex means penetrative sex, oral sex or masturbating together

What happens if you have underage sex?

The law sees it as sexual assault – it’s a criminal offence. This is because in the eyes of the law we are unable to give informed consent to sex when still a child

  • A boy who has sex with a girl under 16 is breaking the law, even if she agrees
  • If she is 13-15, the boy could go to prison for two years
  • If she is under 13 he could be sentenced to life imprisonment
  • A girl age 16 or over who has sex with a boy under 16 can be prosecuted for indecent assault

Signs

Sexual activity includes kissing, sexual touching, oral, anal or vaginal sex with a penis or with any object

Signs that you are consenting to sexual activity:

  • You feel ready
  • You believe you will enjoy it
  • You feel you are taking responsibility for doing it safely

Signs that someone is not consenting to any kind of sexual activity:

  • They are being pressured to change their mind
  • They feel forced or threatened
  • They are not able to give their consent
  • They are not fully conscious
  • They are drunk or high

Advice

Relationships can take many forms, but healthy relationships have good communication and are based on trust and respect.

Be really sure that each person is fully consenting at each moment. If you are unsure then stop. If someone does not give consent and a person still engages in a sexual act with them, this is sexual assault or rape.

This is a crime under The Sexual Offences Act 2003 and has serious consequences.

Where can I get help?

In school you can talk to the following people:

  • A friend
  • Your Tutor
  • A YHS Wellbeing Advisor
  • Pupil Welfare Officer
  • Pastoral Mentor (Drop in sessions Tuesday & Wednesday during break and lunchtime)

In the community:

  • Talk to your parents or GP

Phone lines:
Childline (Free) 0800 1111
York Mind 01904 643364
Samaritans 116 123

Links:
Childline

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